I originally wrote this post after revisiting my blog after a 16 month hiatus- I was annoyed that in “typical Maré fashion” I’d given this up just as soon as I’d begun. After re-reading this post, I find the words ring as true as the day I first wrote them…
“WOW… 1.5 years later” OH WELL!
I think a year ago I would have went over a few self-criticizing points about my lack of commitment, laziness or general disinterest in writing this, but I realize now how my perception held me back, how making excuses doesn’t change anything, and more importantly- how none of this even matters!
I’ve realized a few things since then- about patterns in my life, about motivation and about creativity :
I realized I wasn’t posting to my blog because I was too busy being a perfectionist! I focused too much on what others would think and wasted precious creative time over trying to make it all come across a certain way. Every post had to be a special life lesson, or some thought provoking “a-ha moment” and LENGTHY at that.
I remember my excitement (and fear) in starting this blog only to quickly let it fall by the way side when I found I wasn’t posting consistently or for the right reasons- I beat myself up for not staying committed and ultimately gave up because of it.The completely self-limiting All or Nothing approach.
I realized I don’t need to please anybody to do this. I gave myself a break and decided I don’t have to post on any type of schedule or to any particular specifications. By limiting myself under such guidelines I killed any joy I’d originally found in doing this.
I realized IT’S OK… that I was doing this only for myself, that I don’t have to share these words or bother worrying about “but what will everybody think!?” -It doesn’t matter! I was given the license to do this for me- to seize the moment when I feel it and be proud of the process instead of the result. Proud that I dedicated a small moment in time to document a happy moment in my life.
So that’s all this needs to be. My personal collection of inspiring moments- challenging moments- perhaps life changing moments-or just thoughts and pictures, funny insights, and words.